Friday, June 22, 2012
Babies
I delivered twin boys weighing about 1700 and 1800 gms on 7th June. They came home after a week's time in nicu. One of them has issues still with feeding but my husband and I are trying our best. It's scary at times when he vomits suddenly, or when he shows some difficulty in breathing. We are trying to hang on and take each hour as it comes.
One would wonder why am I not announcing the arrival of my babies in the most euphoric tone. I'm thinking it's because the reality hasn't sunk in yet. I still cannot believe I have children, living, at home. That someone's really going to call us momma and daddy. That the uncertainty that lingered on for months has ended (?). That finally, finally we have closure over something at last (?).
We are indescribably grateful for these babies.Im so indebted to my OB, the fellow blm mommas, all readers of this blog, few compassionate friends who supported me during my pregnancy, God, universe...I'm sure everyone's well meant wishes somehow contributed to me having my babies.
But how I wish few things which happened in the last few months, actually didn't happen. My brother. I shed tears for him everyday. I miss him so much. What a terrible end for him. If he were here today, I would have phoned him and told him about my babies. I constantly wonder where he's now. Miss him. Beyond words can ever express.
A fellow blm mom who according to me is a great human being and although I know her only over the Internet, I know that she's such a deserving mom. How could she have lost her rainbow so cruelly, tragically! I can never fathom. We all started our journey after losing our babies around the same time. How I wish everyone got an happy ending like me.
Last but not the least, names for the twins. I have named one baby after my first son
little Vitu and another after my late brother.
I'm trying to be a less bitter, and a better human being.
I'm still trying to forgive myself (for so many things I haven't even mentioned here). I'm trying to find ways to maintain my sanity and carry on with this life given to me.
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You have always been on my mind and I had wondered when you were due. I am so pleased to hear you had your lil babes and they are coming along. I like that you named your boys after your brother and LIl Vitu. You must be a very busy mama having twins ( are they identical or fraternal?) I hope you are able to find some time to sleep and care for yourself as well. I bet they are so adorable, congrats. xoxoxo
ReplyDeleteCongrats on your boys. I know there is still much pain in the loss of your brother and of course, little Vitu but you deserve happiness too. I hope you enjoy the newborn days with your children. Can't wait to see pictures :)
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on the arrival of Vitu's brothers! And I love that you named the twins after family- so sweet. We gave Grace the middle name of Jack for these same reasons. :)
ReplyDeleteHope you're continuing to do well and congratulations again!
Congrats to you! I've been thinking about you and wondering how you're doing, so it's good to hear from you. I hope you're able to enjoy your days with your sweet little ones :)
ReplyDeleteCongratulations, dear one. You deserve every bit of peace and happiness. I'm glad both of your baby boys made it home with you safe and sound. :)
ReplyDeletecongrats!
ReplyDeleteI have thought about you often, hoping that you were doing okay. I am happy for you that the twins are out and progressing. I wish you and the twins a lifetime of happiness and health together. <3 We will always be missing little Vitu with you. xoxo
ReplyDeleteCongratulations mama... Enjoy these lovely moments you are in now with the babies.... They are precious gifts and please remember babies sense their mother's feelings the most..
ReplyDeleteMay you , your husband and the twins always be blessed with a lifetime of happiness and joy.
Am sure Little Vitu and your brother are smiling from above seeing how happy you all are.
Lots of prayers, blessings and love
Nithya
Congratulations! I truly wish the circumstances of their homecoming were less stressful but am hoping that things continue to settle in and the joyous parts become more real and trusted <3. Welcome home little boys! :)
ReplyDeleteCongrats!!!
ReplyDeleteI feel so happy for you.
God Bless your twin boys.
Enjoy Motherhood.
I am extremely happy for you! Wishing you all a lifetime of happiness.
ReplyDeleteHey, Congrats for your double whammy, couldn't have been happier for you. I am so glad I decided to check your blog after so long. My best wishes for all of u. I hope everything gets sorted out asap. Sorry have been out of touch of sorts, will blame it on the demands of motherhood.
ReplyDeleteI am sorry about your brother but I am sure he would have been just as happy for you.
Vidhi
I'm so happy the twins arrived safe and sound. Remembering your little vitu.
ReplyDelete