It's been a few days since i wrote a post but I have been reading all the blm blogs whenever I could find some time. Thanks for your responses to my last blog. My scar hurts a little less now. But it's sad to remember each time that there is a scar deep down which will never never go away.
It was a better decision to go to work. In a way, days pass quickly now, and although I don't look forward for a new day, somehow it's good to note the dates in calendar being struck away.
I consistently think of what I were doing the same day, same time last year. I was on the moon, indescribably happy, about 8 weeks pregnant with my son. I had lot of morning sickness and had missed one or two days of work already. Now, with a very hot Dubai, am sick sometimes. I walk to the washroom in my office, and look at the mirror, and try to find the person who was sick and happy there last year same time. I don't find her. It's just a sad, super sad, pathetic person I see in the mirror now.
Babies shouldn't die. Honestly, it hurts a lot. I never imagined once that my baby would die and I would be standing here. It's sad beyond words.
I saw a new OB few days ago whom I googled and found to be a high risk doctor in Dubai. Now she told me I can start trying for a baby and she will take care of me. She told me there is a very high possibility that everything will be fine next time. My husband liked her very much.
So I will start trying next month onwards. I really don't believe I will get pregnant right away. I have never been that lucky anytime in my life. Moreover, I have pcos, my husband's count is not super high....it's a tough road ahead.
Wish everyone a good weekend or at least a bearable weekend.
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ReplyDeleteI remember one person saying to me, "Bad things happen." I will never forget this woman who made that comment. She seemed so out of touch with what I was experiencing. This person works in the healthcare/mental health field. Needless to say I did not go back and see her again.
ReplyDeleteI wish you and your husband best of luck in trying to conceive. I hope you are pregnant soon and able to hold a baby in your arms.
Thinking of you and hope your well.
Thinking of you and your little Vitu!
ReplyDeleteI am glad you found an Ob that seems so positive and will be there with you every step of the way through the next pregnancy:)
ReplyDeletePraying for positive pregnancy tests for both of us with in the next few months:)
I am glad the scar is hurting less. It must be a sad reminder of losing the baby. Hoping for a BFP for you soon!
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